Two Fun Ways to Solve Sibling Rivalry during the Holidays October 03 2018
Understanding the principles of different personalities is one BIG way to have an impact on brother/sister relationships.
Some of these concepts are realizing that introverts and extroverts gain and spend energy differently. Specifically, introverts lose energy being around many people, while the opposite is true of extroverts. Knowing which one you are as a parent and which one your child is, will affect many decisions through out the day.
Benefits include: Knowing what to expect reduces stress. Celebrating all personality styles equally increases self-esteem. (This includes parents not pushing their personality style onto their kids, or only favoring the kids that have a similar personality style as they do.)
Families that have learned this important concept either from a book, taking a quiz, or playing an educational game, fare much better than those who have not.
Have the whole family involved with this. The brother and sister could take a personality quiz and in one system, the Personality-Ville map, they could “place” themselves on the map location that represents their preferred way of doing things. There are four “kingdoms” to choose from: Royal Castle, Royal Circus, Royal Observatory, or Royal Cottage. The kids can see what they have in common and what their differences are. It’s a visual way to understand an abstract concept.
Another idea is to set a weekly family sharing time where every member is heard. It could be set up like a 12-step group where one person speaks and the others listen. (It would go something like this, “Hi, I’m Bobby.” The group would answer, “Hi, Bobby.” Bobby speaks—while the others say nothing— “Well, I’ve have a good week this week at school. I wish I did better on my test, but I was really nervous. Thanks for letting me share.” The group then responds, “Thanks, Bobby.” Then another person shares.
There is a fun get-to-know-you game called “Dragon Drool Anonymous” that does exactly that. It’s based on the principle that we all turn into our “Dragon of Defect” when tired, sick, stressed, or just not being aware.